Tuesday, July 15, 2008

Eddie Murphy violated my trust

Well to be more precise, Bill Corbett and Rob Greenberg have stolen my idea for Eddie Murphys new snorefest "Meet Dave".

From Wikipedia:
"On New York's Liberty Island a massive fireball crash lands, with a man emerging unscathed. He's Dave (Eddie Murphy), a human-shaped spaceship controlled by 100 little aliens. Its captain (also played by Murphy) pilots the Dave Spaceship along with his crew from inside its head. The aliens are seeking a way to save their planet from an energy crisis by draining the Earth's Oceans for salt, however complications arise when Dave falls in love with single mom Gina Morrison"

Yet another movie where Eddie Murphy plays himself being a moron, it seems that he's gone past his days of comedy and now resorts to making fat jokes and playing multiple characters with the same personality, with brief stints in children's movies.

To summarise that already short plotline, Dave is a man "piloted" by smaller men, and those smaller men try to woo a lady using their large vessel.

Now here's the plot to my year 12 drama final examination piece; Dave is a man "piloted" by 3 smaller men as he goes on a date to woo some woman.

Not only did they steal the idea of men being piloted by little men, they also used the same damn name for the vessel!!!! And to make it even more mysterious, our year 12 video tape of the final performances was stolen back in 2001, and it looks like it was taken by none other than Eddie Murphy.

I'm outraged and highly amused by this abuse of trust, but I guess it's all fair considering I taped RAW and DELIRIOUS off a friends video for myself, conning Mr Murphy out of 12 dollars. And I'd sue him if I knew I'd have the slightest hint of a chance, but now that I've read that 'Meet Dave' is a box office flop, I'd rather not tarnish my shining reputation as a writer by being associated with this garbage.

On a video game note I've recently acquired Civilisation Revolution on Nintendo DS, which is quickly becoming the greatest console ever created in my eyes, it would surpass SNES as soon as I can get my SNES emulator to work properly on it.

The console is portable gold, the game library is immense and the online capabilities with games like Zelda Phantom Hourglass and Mario Kart are superb, but enough sucking up to the Japanese, here's a quick ReaveYew...

Most people will agree that the DS version of games that originally came out on higher performance home consoles are usually bad, and that the DS does best when they have DS ONLY games, but this is an exception to the rule.

The complex civilisation series has been ported extremely well with this handheld version, alot of the city micromanagement is now simplified, but you still have the option of digging deeper to get the most out of your cities, and the cartoony animations work well.

There are, however, a few complaints I have. For starters, Archers appear to be the most powerful unit in the entire game, despite only have 1 attack and 2 Defence a group of archers defending a city destroyed 2 legions of my Cossack Riders, with 4 attack, +50% elite bonus +100% city attack bonus... so there is either a balance issue, or the attack screen is flawed.

The attack screen shows you your guys vs the other guys, every group of units has 1-3 sub units, and that works fine, in the open field battles it was balanced well, but there must either be a bug when you're defending, or EVERY defender is up against your ONE attacker in that battle but only ONE defender is shown, because it looked like 1 archer was killing 4 horses with the greatest of ease... oh and Abe Linchon mumbles like a drunk pedophile from The Sims.

And one more little thing before I go, check out the Blood Bowl trailer here. It's a small game made by a small company, but I've been waiting for it nearly as long as I've been waiting for Fallout 3, online multiplayer tournaments on this game will be fantastic if they stick to the original tabletop rules.

And if they don't? Well the lower tiers of hell are reserved for traitors...


Ruroremy said...

Eddie Murphy = fail.
The last "good" role he had - or maybe that's the only good role he ever had - was Donkey from Shrek.

If you like CivRev, you should try out Anno 1701 on the DS sometime, I love that game.

Tom said...

Anno 1701 looks good, I'll get it this weekend.