Monday, January 19, 2009

Perky Boobs and Arthritis

I've never been a fan of news that isn't news.

There are always little amusing stories in the papers, usually something about a dog saving a cat or an old person smokes a ciggerette for the first time in Nepal. But, especially online, there are news stories that shouldnt' qualify as news at all, and are merely shit filler material that no-one cares about.

I'm talking about the gossipy Brad and Angelina garbage.. the Amy Winehouse trash, stories about game addiction without proper research, and everything like it. I opened this morning and the main news article was about Kendra Wilkinson and how she is begging Hugh Hefner for forgiveness after spilling her guts about their intimate moments.

For starters, the entire world does not want to fucking hear about 23yr old's having sex with an 82 yr old man. I don't care who he is, sure he's the playboy man, the original "playa" but for fucks sake. He's EIGHTY TWO. You can only imagine the type of sex tape that would produce.

- Hugh pops pill
- Hugh lies down
- Kendra staddles him "carefully" so as not to break a hip
- Kendra suffers lifelong shame

You know the only thing Kendra is having sex with is his money, that's her only thought in her head I'm sure of it. His entire lifestyle makes me want to punch children...

The news article under it was about a newsreader who failed to read the news... that's just too stupid to even go into detail.

"200 dead in earthquake!? fuck it, let's run the story about the old dude fucking the young chick"

This is why Anna Nicole never faded from obscurity, and look what happened to her....