Sammy chews it! YOU SHOULD TOO!

I'm sitting here at my grandmother's house watching “Home Cooked” or something to that effect, with the winner of the first season of masterchef as the host, my wife is yelling at the TV for some reason, apparently she hates this woman to death despite never watching an episode of MasterChef.

I'm pretty sus about this show. She's using too many 'Glad' products, which tells me they're the main sponsor. The entire show plays like an extended informercial for Glad with some recipes thrown in.

Everything on TV these days is about making as much money as possible. Product placement and sponsorship crap means that programs are less about what the content is and more about what products they pitch us in the ad break. The same thing has been happening in our video games too.

I remember playing Splinter Cell: Chaos Theory, the best game in the series (I haven't played Conviction yet), and in one cut scene I noticed there was a packet of Air Waves gum next to a radio. The packet was in a corner and I accepted it as subtle advertising. I mean, why wouldn't a person put their gum next to a radio? But later in the game Sam is boarding a helicopter on his next mission to kill a political figure in true Tom Clancy fashion when he reaches into his pocket and pulls out a packet of cool refreshing soothing Airwaves Gum! That minty tastes lasts for hours! BUY IT NOW YOU WANT AIRWAVES GUM SAM FISHER CHEWS IT

AND SAM FISHER KILLS PEOPLE

SAM FISHER WILL KILL YOU IF YOU DON'T BUY AIRWAVES GUM

HE WILL FIND YOU

AND HE WILL RAPE YOU

AIR

WAVES

GUM

.. so he pops a minty capsule into his mouth and some guy in the copter shoots him a smile in recognition. The inclusion of the product in the cut scene is bad enough, but to have the main character directly interact with the product is inexcusable. But the clincher for me was that knowing smile the guy gave him. That split second smile made that entire sequence a full blown commercial. I half expected Sam to turn to him and say.

“Say there, would you care for some Airwaves gum?!”

“AIRWAVES GUM!! BLOW ME DOWN AND FUCK MY MOTHER! I FUCKING LOVE AIRWAVES GUM!”

Then both characters turn to the screen.

“Airwaves Gum, buy it and chew the FUCK OUT OF IT YOU MINDLESS CONSUMER WHORE”

Unfortunately Airwaves Gum isn't sold in Australia, so when I raced to the store with a wad of bills in one hand and my dick in the other I was disappointed....

.. and promptly arrested for indecent exposure.